“Your Expectations Are Disabling”

It’s exhausting to seek accommodations. Here’s how to make it smoother.

“I am disabled” and “I have X disability” don’t mean what you think they mean. To you they reference ableist norms and practices — the very stuff of late-bootstrap grind culture. But to your interlocutor, they mean something very different. They hear, “something is wrong with me”; and they’re invited to the level-up their ableism. Cue paternalism, discrimination and stigma. Don’t let it happen. You can’t crash-course them in disability studies, but you…